


A Practical Approach to Unexpected Parenthood

by Lisa_Telramor



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Other, Post-Series, Queerplatonic Relationships, it's complicated - Freeform, past oc relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-04-26
Packaged: 2018-03-25 21:57:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3826471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lisa_Telramor/pseuds/Lisa_Telramor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Akira returns home to find Shindou and a baby that most certainly was not there when he left home that morning. If he can get Shindou to calm down, and the baby to stop crying, perhaps he can understand what exactly is going on, and go from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Practical Approach to Unexpected Parenthood

**Author's Note:**

> An older fic. This is something that I wrote about 2? years ago, forgot about, and just found in my WIP files. I believe I intended to write more to this at one point. Frankly I have no memory of where I planned to go with it, and as it felt like a decent point for a fic to end at any rate, I've decided to post it. 
> 
> For those interested, Hikaru is straight in this fic, Akira is gay and emotionally attracted to Hikaru, and they moved in together at some point. You can choose to view it as preslash or as its own complicated not-quite-romance as it was intended to be, I just hope it's enjoyable to read.

When Akira returned to the apartment that afternoon, he wasn’t expecting the site that greeted him. In the middle of the living room floor was Shindou. This in itself wasn’t so strange. Shindou had the habit to lounge on whatever surface was available, and he changed what he considered comfortable by the hour. What was strange was the baby—who couldn’t be more than a few months old—on the floor in front of Shindou. He had a wild look of panic on his face.

“Touya,” Shindou said without looking away from the baby. “Thank god you’re back. Do you know how to change a diaper?”

“No.” Akira flinched when Shindou looked at him. His hair was a mess; there were tiny scratch marks on his cheek from what must have been tiny, baby fingernails, and what looked like spit-up on his shirt. “Shindou, why is there a baby in our apartment?”

“It just…showed up. Her mother is Yui. You know that girl I was dating when I first moved in with you.”

“The one that threatened to shave my head because she thought we were sleeping with each other?”

“Yes.” The baby on the floor, who had been sleeping peacefully, twitched and made hiccupping sounds that might be the start of a sob. Shindou made a noise that could be a terrified whine or just a sound of desperation and made shushing noises, not quite touching the baby like if he did it would explode. “Um,” he said, voice much softer for fear of waking the baby. “She’s been crying for over an hour. I couldn’t get her to stop and I think she’s hungry and has a dirty diaper but I don’t know what to do with the stuff in the diaper bag and please help.”

“Shindou, this still doesn’t explain where the baby came from.” Akira glanced around and sure enough, there was a child’s carry-or-car seat and a Hello Kitty diaper bag. The bright pink diaper bag looked alien in the soft blues and greys and greens they decided for the apartment décor. Or Akira had decided. Shindou’s contribution had been “no pink or purple” and that was that. When Shindou sent him another panicked look, Akira rolled his eyes and walked over to the diaper bag. There was a can of formula in the main pouch and four clean disposable diapers alongside two cloth ones. In a side pouch was a change of clothes, a bright yellow stuffed duck, and a binky. The last pocket held wipes and an empty bottle. A crumpled piece of paper was next to the car seat, but Akira ignored it for the moment. He pulled out one of the disposable diapers. It seemed pretty self explanatory on how it was used.

The baby whimpered again and Akira sighed. He wasn’t getting any sense from Shindou until the baby was taken care of. “Does she at least have a name?” Akira asked. He tucked the diaper under his arm and grabbed the wipes and the formula. With a bit of maneuvering, he managed to hold the bottle as well.

“Rei. She’s Rei.” Shindou blinked as Akira thrust the formula and bottle in his face.

“Here. Follow the directions and make up a bottle. I’ll change her, we’ll feed her, and then we’ll have a nice cup of tea and talk.”

“Touya…” Akira thought Shindou was going to kiss him for a moment, but he took the bottle and formula and went for the kitchen leaving Akira to face the sleeping baby.

Akira eyed the dark pink shorts Rei wore. Well. Parents did this every day. It shouldn’t be too hard to change a diaper. Getting the diaper _off_ wasn’t the problem, Akira soon found. It was figuring out how to get a new one on. He wrinkled his nose at the mess of the original diaper as Rei whimpered, awake from the removal of her shorts. Well, that was what wipes were for. He used three before he felt she was clean enough to put in a new diaper and then it was an awkward half-lift onto the new diaper. He remembered to support her head. He remembered someone somewhere telling him that babies couldn’t support their heads on their own until a certain age. By this point Rei was awake and squalling. Akira sealed the new diaper closed. Forget putting the shorts back on. They were stained along the edges from where the diaper failed to catch everything to begin with.

He picked the baby up like a breakable object. Akira didn’t know where to start trying to calm her so he carried her to the kitchen. Shindou was staring at the microwave as the numbers blinked toward zero like it was a lifeline. “Her diaper’s changed.”

“Oh.” Shindou blinked. “Um, what did you do with the old diaper?”

“It’s still in the living room. How do you stop a baby from crying?” Rei squirmed and made unhappy sounds against Akira’s chest.

“I don’t know.”

“Oh.” The timer beeped. Shindou pulled out the bottle. “Is it warm?”

“Yes?” Shindou stuck his finger in the formula mixture. “It’s not burning or anything. Which is good. It can’t be too hot or something because then she’d get burned and what kind of sicko burns a baby and I don’t know if I used enough formula because I can’t tell how many ounces are in a bottle and—”

“Hikaru,” Akira said sharply. “You’re rambling.”

“Oh. Right. Uh…” He screwed the lid onto the bottle. “I guess I feed her now?”

Akira wandered over to the counter and picked up the can of formula with the arm not holding the baby. “Shindou, you’re not supposed to heat the formula in the microwave. It says right on it.”

“Shit.” Shindou sat down at the table. The bottle tipped on its side, almost rolling off the table before Akira slammed the formula can in its path. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I tried to get a hold of my mom but no one picked up the phone. They said they were going on vacation soon, I didn’t realize it was this week. Grandpa wasn’t home. Akari ‘s cell phone went to voice mail and I don’t know Nase well enough to call her. I don’t have Yui’s phone number to get in touch with her to give her her baby back either.”

“Here.” Akira held Rei out. Shindou took her from Akira with trembling hands and held her against his chest. Akira took the formula and dumped it out in the sink before following the instructions to make up a new bottle. Rei’s whimpering quieted little by little until by the time he had a properly prepared bottle she was trying to grab Shindou’s bangs in between bouts of whining. “Feed her,” Akira said. “I’ll call my mother, we’ll make a plan for the near future, and we can talk. Ok?”

“Yeah. Yeah, thanks Touya.” Shindou laughed a bit hysterically. “I don’t know what I’d’ve done if you didn’t come home just then.”

“Feed her,” Akira repeated. He returned to the living room. With a mild feeling of disgust, he moved the diaper and wipes to the garbage in the bathroom and washed his hands well.  Babies were messy. Akira retrieved his phone from his coat and dialed home.  His mother picked up on the third ring. “Hello, Mother? I need some help.”

*****

Half an hour later Akira returned to the kitchen to find Shindou patting Rei’s back with more spit up on his shirt. She sounded happier though and some of the tension had left Shindou’s face, a relaxing of skin around his eyes.  “Mother recommends buying diapers in bulk, feeding her every few hours in small amounts, burping her, and giving her frequent naps. She also plans to come over tomorrow to show how to properly care for a child. She’s bringing my old baby clothes.”

“Thank god.”

“She said to put a towel on your shoulder when burping. It keeps you clean when babies spit up.”

“Great to know now.” Shindou looked at the baby in his arms. “I think she’s all burped out. Think she’ll sleep?”

“We can put her in her car seat with her duck for now.” Akira fetched the items from the living room and in a few minutes Rei was staring up at them from the seat chewing droolingly on one orange duck foot.

“Is that sanitary?” Shindou asked.

“Probably not, but considering I almost ate several go stones when I was a baby, I don’t think a plush duck is going to hurt her,” Akira said. He put water in the electric kettle, going through the motions of tea-making. After a glance in the fridge, he popped last night’s leftovers into the microwave. Shindou slumped forward with the top half of his body on the table watching Rei gurgle and drool.

Akira measured tea leaves, poured water, and dished out leftovers onto plates. He set forks and food on the table shortly followed by tea. “So. How exactly did you end up with a baby?”

“Uhh… It’s complicated?” Shindou ran a hand through his hair and made a face as he ran into a tangle. The disgruntled expression turned to disgust as he realized it was stuck together with dried baby puke. “Eww.”

“Drink your tea and explain,” Akira said, unsympathetic.

“Fine.” Shindou picked up his fork and moved fried rice in piles around his plate. “So this morning I woke up to a message on my phone from Yui. I thought it was a bit weird cuz she hasn’t contacted me since we broke up. I mean, except for that one drunk call a few weeks after we broke up, but that was to swear at me so…” He coughed and glanced at Akira, then at the baby. “Um, it said to check outside the door. I deleted it because, well, it seemed stupid at first, but then I got curious… I opened the front door and there was the baby, bundled up asleep with a diaper bag with a letter taped on it. Yui wasn’t anywhere around from what I can tell. The baby woke up when I moved her inside and I had about enough time to read the letter before she started crying. I spent a good hour getting her to stop crying, and she didn’t stop until she threw up all over my shirt.”

“Is she even yours?” Akira asked. He took a bite of the rice. It was about as tasteless as it was yesterday, but neither he nor Shindou were very good at cooking. He’d have to use more onion and soy sauce or something.

“Yui seems convinced she is,” Shindou said glumly. He ate some rice and looked like he was going to spit it out. Akira got the soy sauce from the cupboard. It would make it taste at least a bit better…or at least mask the flavor.

“Is it even possible for her to be your child?” Akira asked. He was sure Shindou had slept with most of his girlfriends at one point or another; the relaxed posture after certain dates hinted at that much at least, but Akira thought he would at least be careful about it. “Didn’t you use protection?”

“We did! Or at least we usually did. There was only a couple times when we didn’t and that was because Yui’s doctor put her on birth control to make, er, her period more regular, but she didn’t really like what the hormones were doing to her and she stopped taking them. I swear I didn’t sleep with her unprotected when she wasn’t on birth control.” Shindou put his hands up, grains of rice stuck on his fork. He shook his head. “At least as far as I know. I was careful. Even drunk I made sure I had a condom.”

“Condoms aren’t foolproof,” Akira said slowly. “One could have broken or been defective.”

“I can use a condom properly, Touya. They didn’t break.”

“Well, she’s proof that something went wrong with someone.” They stared at the bright eyed Rei chewing on her duck. “You should get a paternity test.”

Shindou almost spat out the tea he was drinking. “What? Why?”

“She might not be your daughter,” Akira said. Just because Shindou’s ex thought it was his, there was a chance Rei wasn’t. Especially if she thought Shindou was cheating on her with Akira at the time. Jealousy tended to lead to some foolish behavior. Akira could list off idiotic things he’d said or done over the years because he was jealous of others having too much of Shindou’s attention.

“You think Yui might have been cheating on me?” Shindou puffed up like it was a personal insult to even suggest it. Akira rolled his eyes.

“Shindou, you don’t even know her exact age. She might have been the child born off a rebound relationship for all we know. Time wise, she might fit the time frame since it has been about a year since you broke up with Yui, but she might not. Can you tell how old she is by looking at her?”

“No…” Shindou poked at his rice.

“So don’t jump to conclusions.” Akira took a gulp of his tea before dripping soy sauce on his rice. “We’ll get a paternity test tomorrow or the day after, try to track down Yui, and if it turns out that she really is your daughter we’ll make plans for something a bit more permanent.”

Shindou’s fork dropped from between his fingers. “You don’t plan on keeping her do you? I mean you didn’t even okay a cat and now you’re saying let’s raise a baby?”

Akira frowned. “Shindou. A child isn’t like an animal.”

“No they’re a lot more trouble and a lot more messy.” He shook his head. “I can’t be a parent. I barely even managed half a day.”

“If she’s your child, she’s your responsibility whether you want to be a parent or not,” Akira said. “If you won’t claim her and Yui won’t claim her, she’ll end up in an orphanage. Do you really want that?”

“Well, no, but…” Shindou studied Akira’s face. “You realize that if I raise her that means we’re raising her together. We live together so it’s kind of inescapable. And that if we raise a baby together our house isn’t really ours anymore right?”

“I can grasp that, yes.” Akira finished off his rice and calmly sipped at his remaining tea. Really, he was handling this much better than Shindou. Shindou was the one that spent most of his time out of the apartment. If anything, Akira would be more affected by the change. He would have to deal with never having a quiet moment again. And, well, he wouldn’t leave Shindou high and dry to care for a baby on his own. Actually, he was a bit afraid of how a child would survive if left with only Shindou to rely upon.  “If she truly is your child, I am more than willing to help you raise her.”

“Oh my god, you like babies don’t you.” Shindou looked horrified like Akira sprouted a new head. Akira raised an eyebrow and waited for the freak out to end. “You want a house full of little terrors calling you Dad and teaching them to be freaky go prodigies by the time they’re out of diapers.”

“There is nothing wrong with wanting a child someday Shindou.” Akira set his empty tea cup down. Rei was quiet in her car seat, eyes closed in sleep with a line of drool going from her chin to the plush duck in her lap.

“Isn’t that a problem with you being—” Shindou cut off at last minute looking guilty.

Akira pinned him with a glare. “Being what, Shindou? If you’re going to try to insult me at least have the guts to finish your statement.”

“Gay,” Shindou grit out. The tea cup was in a white knuckled grip that did nothing to hide how his shoulders inched toward his ears. Shindou blushed.

“For your information, sexuality does not, in fact, change a person’s desire or disinterest in raising a family.” Akira rolled the empty tea cup between his hands. Shindou had only brought up Akira’s sexuality twice since Akira brought it up one drunken night when Shindou convinced him the wine they bought to cook with would be much better drunk. Akira hadn’t touched wine since then, and while Shindou accepted Akira sexuality and all, the only times it had been brought up had lead to some nasty arguments. Shindou had no sense of tact and a clear stereotype in mind paired with homosexuality.

“Sorry,” Shindou said a few minutes later. “I didn’t mean it that way.”

“No.” Akira sighed. “You did mean it that way. I forgive you anyway.” Shindou’s rice was long cold. Neither moved to clear the table.

“I am sorry. I just don’t know how to handle this,” Shindou whispered.

“Whatever happens, I will help you through it,” Akira said. “Because I need you at your best as my rival and friend.”

“Thanks.” Shindou touched Akira’s arm. His fingers were cold. Akira waited a moment before he touched Shindou’s hand. When he pulled back, they said nothing, getting up together to do the dishes.

*****

Akira sat on the living room floor making Rei laugh as he dangled the stuffed duck over her. Her plump, clumsy fingers grasped for the duck, but Akira only had eyes for Shindou. The paternity test results came back with the morning mail, but Shindou had held off opening them until Akira was present. Akira wasn’t sure if it was because he was involved or if Shindou needed the moral support. Shindou slit the envelope and read its contents, flipping from page to page.

“Well?” Akira asked the third time Shindou cycled through. Rei tugged the duck from Akira’s hand and stuffed it in her mouth with a happy gurgle.

“She’s mine.” Shindou tossed the papers to the side. “99.9% certainty.”

“Okay.” As much as Shindou had been hoping Rei wasn’t his, Akira couldn’t deny that Rei looked a little like him, and she seemed to share his personality. She was stubborn, excitable, and loud.

“That’s it? Okay?” Shindou waved the hand not pinching the bridge of his nose in a small circle. “Okay, you’re a father. Congrats. Time to grow up, is that it?”

“No.” Akira left Rei to chewing her duck to sit next to Shindou on the couch. “I meant, okay, she’s yours. Now what are you going to do about it?”

“Adopt her? Officially?”

“You’re sure?” Akira touched Shindou’s shoulder. The faded yellow cotton of one of Shindou’s old number five shirts was soft under Akira’s fingers. Akira thought he could feel Shindou’s pulse racing.

“How is anyone ever sure about these kinds of things?” Shindou asked. He leaned on Akira for a moment and Akira held him as he shook. “Yui might not want her, but…I can’t just abandon a baby to the adoption system. Even if I don’t really think I’m parent material.”

“Well, at least you won’t be raising her alone.” Akira stroked Shindou’s hair. It was rougher than Akira’s own hair and stiff in places with hair product. “You’ll have me, and your mother volunteered to babysit on game days, and my mother will help if we need it. And you know that Waya-san will spoil her rotten once he gets over the shock of you having a daughter.” Akira didn’t really like Waya. He was too loud, and he lacked the spark Shindou had to make up for his noise. And Akira was sure that Waya didn’t like him anymore that Akira liked Waya. Still, he couldn’t deny that Waya was a good friend to Shindou.

Shindou laughed a bit at that, his shoulders shaking against Akira’s chest. “True. He’d be like a weird uncle or something.” He held still, his breath stirring against Akira’s collar bone. Akira concentrated on relaxing Shindou’s hair from its style, rubbing his scalp in places Akira got tension headaches when he spent too much time studying or reading.  Shindou relaxed into it. “Touya. Do you think I can raise a kid?”

“Alone? No.” Akira moved his rubbing to the back of Shindou’s neck, gentle and sure. “With help, I think you can be a good parent.”

“You’d be the only one.”

“No one can be perfect at parenting,” Akira said.

“They can be responsible. I’m not responsible. I barely remember to pay my half of the electric bill every month and make sure my laundry is clean.”

Akira hugged Shindou for a moment before pushing him back so he could meet his eyes. “Let’s look at it this way. Be the best parent you can, and I’ll fill in what you can’t do.”

Shindou laughed. “So does that make you the mom in this fucked up scenario?”

Akira whapped Shindou on the back of his head. “No! And watch your mouth, eventually she’s going to pick those words up.” Akira huffed, giving Shindou a push to send him sprawling along the couch. “I’m saying since you’re not raising her alone, we’ll cover each other’s weaknesses. I’ll provide structure, order, and hopefully patience. You’re better with spontaneity and, well, fun, even if it is not the kind of fun I enjoy. Children like you. I’ve seen you speaking to the elementary students at the Children’s Go tournament. They were having a great time.”

“That’s with kids. Not babies. You know, kids you can have a conversation with.” Shindou levered himself onto his elbows. His fringe, black showing at the roots where he failed to bleach it since Rei dropped into their lives, fell across his eyes, hiding them from Akira’s view. He wanted to push the hair back, to meet Shindou’s eyes and challenge him, because only a challenge could pull him forward from here, only a reminder of their goal would convince him that the world had not ended. Akira didn’t brush the hair away. He would have to climb into Shindou’s lap to do it, and, close as they were, they weren’t that intimate. “Touya, why are you so intent on helping me? This isn’t the kind of thing you can just pull back on later. This is years of commitment.” Shindou pulled his legs close until he was scrunched with his knees a barrier between them. “What if you find some guy you want to have your own family with, and you’re stuck raising a kid with me?”

“Maybe I want to raise a child with you,” Akira said before he could think to regret speaking. “Maybe I see myself by your side ten or twenty years down the line, because you’re you.”

Shindou looked up and his eyes were wide and bright, bright green between strands of hair. “Careful. That sounds a lot like a love confession.”

Akira raised an eyebrow. “I will push you off the couch.”

“It did though!” Shindou sat straight and his legs parted so he was cross-legged. He grinned and he looked like the Shindou Akira spent half his life chasing around, maddening but endearing. “What’s next, you going to declare your undying love?”

“Shut up.” Akira pushed Shindou’s leg and Shindou unbalanced, falling to the ground with a yelp. Akira smirked. “I don’t have to be in undying love to want to be by your side.”

Shindou laughed, his whole body shaking, laughing like he hadn’t in weeks. “God, if more people saw this side of you, they wouldn’t call me the immature one all the time.”

“I’m sure.” Akira offered his hand. Shindou took it and yanked hard. Akira sprawled on top of him. Akira blinked at Shindou’s wide grin inches from his face. “ _I’m_ the immature one?”

“Well, I think it’s safe to say we’re both immature.” Shindou hadn’t let go of Akira’s hand yet and Akira made no move to pull free. “Want to play a game of go and prove just how maturely immature we are by annoying each other with our strategies?”

“Hell yes.”

“Language,” Shindou tutted. He laughed and Akira laughed with him. Rei joined in with a shriek, but it was a happy one, nothing like her feed/change/hold-me cries.

“I think we might be able to get half a game in before she needs something if we play speed go,” Akira said.

“Deal. I’m going to beat you by so many _moku_ you’ll have to stay just to regain your pride.”

“And I’ll beat you so you’ll have to keep coming back.”


End file.
